Discouraged About Summer Reading?

The signs of a shut-down learner typically start to emerge in the upper elementary grades, and become much more pronounced by high school. They include:

  • A sense that the child is increasingly disconnected, discouraged, and unmotivated
  • Fundamental skill weaknesses with reading, writing, and spelling, leading to diminished self-esteem
  • Increased avoidance of school tasks such as homework
  • Dislike of reading
  • Hatred of writing
  • Little or no gratification from school
  • Increasing anger toward school

How I spend my free time

A simple formula helps to explain how kids become shut-down learners:

Cracks in the foundation + Time + Lack of Understanding + Strained Family Communication= Shut-Down Learner

Understanding this formula will help parents of children like Emma and Jacob to be in a better position to take appropriate action.

Cracks in a child’s learning can usually be identified as early as preschool and kindergarten age. Does your child have trouble learning letter names and their sounds, for example? By first grade, is your child taking steps toward blending sounds? In middle to upper elementary school, is writing a laborious, often agonizing process for your son or daughter? If the answer is “yes” to these questions, it does not necessarily follow that your child will become a shut-down learner. However, like cracks in your house that expand if unaddressed, it is important to act to prevent academic cracks from widening. Otherwise, they will contribute to discouragement over time and a child ultimately shutting down.

Lack of Understanding: In my evaluation of shut-down learners, I have found that many receive work on a daily basis that they simply cannot handle, causing them unnecessary frustration. Too often, parents and teachers do not understand the skill deficits that are causing a child difficulty. For example, I recently tested a fourth-grader who struggled to read certain words presented in a text, including “porcupine,” “passage” and “amazement.” Since most fourth-graders read silently to themselves, her teacher and parents mistakenly believed that the student had a comprehension problem, when she was actually experiencing difficulties with word-reading and decoding. Additionally, many children who struggle in school simply do not have problems deemed to be “severe enough” to warrant special education. For those children, parents will need to seek outside remedial help in the form of tutoring, where available.

Strained Family Communication: The beginning of homework time often marks an increase in the household temperature, as screaming and arguing become part of the landscape. Strained communication around homework can be overwhelming for families and can contribute to a child’s becoming a shut-down learner.

Addressing (or preventing) shut-down learners

Trust your gut: If you believe your child is experiencing difficulties at school, listen to yourself. Don’t wait, or fall for such oft-used statements as, “You know how boys are,” or “She’ll grow out of it.” Act on your feelings even if your child has been deemed in eligible for school services. Consult a trustworthy, competent person outside of school whom you feel comfortable with, to assess your child.

Know what you are targeting: If your child’s assessment has identified issues of concern, chances are an area in your child’s reading needs addressing. There are essentially two types of reading problems in the first, the child has trouble decoding words and reading fluently. In the second, the child can read fluently, but experiences great difficulty understanding what he has read. Get clear on the exact issues that you hope to resolve. Don’t scattershot remediation.Reading Superhero dog drawing

Take the heat out of the interaction: Try to step back a little bit and turn down the heat within the house. The daily ritual of yelling, pecking or nagging never leads to positive change. When was the last time your child said, “Thanks for yelling, Mom, I see your point. I’ll get down to business”? Right. Never. Why persist? Your kids are probably feeling overwhelmed by homework that they can barely handle. In raising the heat, you’re simply adding stress to their lives. Turn down the temperature. Kids need emotional fuel to tackle their school difficulties, especially those kids who derive little gratification from their efforts. Look for the small things that your child is doing well. Statements, like, ”Wow, I like the way you took out your work tonight without my asking,” can really mean a lot to a child, especially one who might be a bit discouraged.

Find someone to connect with and mentor your child in school: The shut-down learners I know do not feel very good about themselves and they do not see their true strengths. If your child is of middle-school age or older (those preteen and teenage years when the development of a sense of self is critical), it is particularly important for him to have at least one person in school who really values him will rally on your child’s behalf, even if he isn’t succeeding academically.

Maintain a sense of equilibrium: Do something fun with your child. Play a board game or do an arts and crafts project together. Try not to let school problems set the tone for the entire household and all of your interactions.

Support your child: Academic discouragement is debilitating to children and families. Connecting with your child’s natural strengths and letting him know that you are both on the same “team” can make an enormous difference in preventing your child from becoming a shut-down learner.

Do something fun and enjoyable with your child. Try not to let school problems set the tone for the entire household and all of your interactions.

 

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